Happy morning folks! 

As always, here is your daily dose of the news that matters, from Wall Street to Dalal Street - in 5 minutes and 7 seconds. 

That's less time than it takes for Europe to raise eyebrows over a gas leak, Celsius's embattled CEO to step down, and Revolut to get the green light to promote crypto.

Let’s dive in.

What’s hot, what’s not?

Market Commentary

• British Pound has had some relief - it bounced back after quite a disastrous week.

• The SP500 hit it's lowest level since November 2020! Heads down for a while now. No one's in a party mood. 🤷

• Yields on debt rose all the way from New York to Berlin as bonds sold off.

Story Roundup

1 - Europe gets wary of gas sabotage. 💣

During routine checks, European gas officials found something weird.

Pipelines that delivered them natural gas from Russia had leaks.

German energy ministers said that the sudden loss in pressure at both pipes could be the result of "a targeted attack".

An advisor to the president of Ukraine went so far as to call it a "planned terrorist attack by Russia". 😬

These leaks won't affect Europe right now - since Russia weren't supplying them gas anyways - but it's still puzzling to see something as 'coincidental' as this. 

Something's loose... 🤷

2 - Celsius is in some more hot water. 🥵

The heat is turning up on bankrupt crypto lender Celsius Network.

Alex Mashinsky - the CEO of the network resigned yesterday with a lengthy apology for the "difficult financial circumstances" he'd left the company in.

Celsius filed for bankruptcy in July with a $1.2 billion hole in it's balance sheet. Hundreds of thousands of investors saw their money evaporate overnight. 

He left because his role at the company "was becoming an increasing distraction". Almost like it's his job. 😂

Celsius is currently sitting on a few high quality assets - but only time will tell what happens with them.

Hot water. Boiling hot water. 🚿

3 - Investors rush to snap up Porsche's IPO. 💸

Porsche is expected to deliver Europe's biggest IPO tomorrow.

Their owner Volkswagen has managed to ignore all signs of doom and gloom in the market, and raise almost $10 billion from the sale.

Volkswagen is selling off 12.5% of the company's non-voting shares to the market, giving Porsche a market cap of $75.2 billion.

They want to use all this cash to supercharge their entry into the EV space - since development into both software and battery tech is absolutely key.

Interesting to see that they'll be offering 911 million shares - simply because that's the model of their flagship car. 

The race is on! 🏎️

4 - Revolut gets the green flag for crypto business. 🫰

Finance app Revolut is finally in regulatory heaven.

The UK's financial regulator has allowed them to operate their cryptocurrency business in Britain - right after they issued a warning against Binance and crypto as a whole.

Revolut will now be able to offer trading and custody of crypto-assets. 

They had to answer quite a few ugly questions earlier this year regarding a data breach that affected their customers, senior executives fleeing, and weak internal controls.

Sun seems to be shining - and there's hay to be made. 🌾

5 - Zanzibar wants some of Silicon Valley's spotlight. 🔦

Say hi to Caleb again for this snippet!

Zanzibar just announced its campaign to become Africa’s next tech hub, ‘Silicon Zanzibar.’

They're banking on its crystal clear waters, sandy beaches and balmy weather to lure tech companies to their shores.

Here is the bull case for Silicon Zanzibar:

1) A tax holiday 🏖️Zanzibar will offer a tax holiday for tech companies that set up in the country for ten years. Like living in Zanzibar isnt enough of a holiday.

2) Good Company 🫂Leading the migration to Silicon Zanzibar is Wasoko, one of Africa’s fastest growing companies. Wasoko is relocating 40 of their staff and senior leaders, including the CEO, Daniel Yu.

3) Easy Living 🛩Zanzibar is set up for ease of access, with direct flights from over 20 destinations in Africa, Europe and the Middle East, and Zanzibar will offer Working Visas for any relocating tech workers.

I’d love to see Zanzibar become the next haven for tech workers and companies looking to reawaken their creativity, rejuvenate their bodies and get some more soul sun in them. 

Hope you enjoyed this issue of the Market Munch. If you've got any feedback - good or bad (😏) you can hit reply to this email. Thanks a ton for reading!

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Cheers, and have a lovely day. 🙏

Aryaansh